Is It From Modesty and Shyness or Weakness If I Leave Off Speaking To My Christian Family About Islam Because They Always Get Angry When I Speak To Them About Religion by Shaykh Dr. ʿArafāt ibn Ḥasan al-Muḥammadī

Pivotal Quote

❝It is a must upon you to keep debating and arguing with them and not just one time, but three, four, five and ten times.  It is a must upon you to establish upon them the proofs and evidences, along with having good manners because good manners is a must when giving daʿwah.❞

Question:

I am a Muslim in Martinique and my family are all Christian. I have been calling them to Islām by dealing with them in the best possible way.  I do not argue with them in regards to the religion, especially in the affairs of their own religion except in very few instances. Rather, it is seldom that I talk to them about it because whenever I come to them with proofs and evidences, they get mad at me and cut off the discussion or the argument. This is why I left calling them based upon proofs and evidences and I concentrated upon good manners to call them to Islām, yet they still call me back to Christianity with their proofs and evidences whenever they can. Is my action correct and is it from the wisdom and praiseworthy ḥayā’ (shyness/modesty) to be upon that or is it considered a weakness and unpraiseworthy ḥayā’? 

Answer:

It seems that you have established the proofs and evidences upon your family and the way you are asking that question only indicates that your family are people of jahūd, people who have hatred for Islām because they now know the truth and they want to leave off the truth. They don’t want to stick to the truth. So, my advice to you my dear brother or sister, is to be patient with them. It is a must upon you to keep debating and arguing with them and not just one time, but three, four, five and ten times.  It is a must upon you to establish upon them the proofs and evidences, along with having good manners because good manners is a must when giving daʿwah.

Because When a kāfir (disbeliever) sees from you good manners and how you deal with him upon the way of Muḥammad (صلى الله عليه وسلم) and in addition to this or hand in hand with this you are calling him to Islām, then that may become a reason for him or her to enter into Islām. This is what happens; meaning, good manners, when applied hand in hand with establishing proofs and evidences, is what happened when the Muslims went to the continent of Asia and started dealing with the people in trade. People saw from the Muslims nothing except honesty, lack of treason and no betrayal whatsoever in transactions. People then became Muslims due to their good manners.  And that is always the case that the Muslim is upon praiseworthy manners. 

Many of the people as you probably know in the sīrah were affected by the manners of the Prophet Muḥammad (صلى الله عليه وسلم) and entered Islām accordingly. As one of men that became a Muslim after meeting with the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) went back to his people and said to them “I came back to you from a man that is not afraid of poverty and gives so much in a way that he is never afraid of poverty.”

It is a must upon you to continue clarifying the affairs of tawḥīd (monotheism) based upon proofs and evidences along with good manners.  It is a must upon you to call them towards tawḥīd and monotheism the way the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) did with each and every individual he met. Remember that the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) kept on calling the people to tawḥīd even in the last breath of his life while he was on his death bed and he said “May the curse of Allāh be upon the Jews and the Christians, they have taken the graves of their Prophets as masājid”. And the success is only from Allāh; Allāh guides whoever He wills and misguides whoever He wills. And Allāh knows best.

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